In my previous article, I talked about what adaptation means, and how accepting the disease is a lengthy process that isn’t always easy, especially because of the phenomenon of hypersexualization. Nowadays, women’s bodies are a big focus of our society, and this can definitely make women compare themselves to society’s beauty standards.

In this article, I would like to talk about the role self-esteem plays in the lengthy process of adaptation and disease’s acceptation. As I mentioned earlier, the beauty standards we see every day definitely put pressure on us. For example, when flipping through a magazine, you see multiple ads showing young women with a perfect body, tan, and make-up… You’re looking at a perfect woman.  So when you stop looking at the magazine, and look at yourself in the mirror… I’m sure it already happened to you, so I’ll let you imagine what comes next.

Self-esteem is how we see and value ourselves. It’s usually built during childhood, but we develop and rebuild it throughout our lives because of the different experiences we go through. I used beauty standards to briefly show you one aspect of self-esteem. However, this concept is extremely vast and touches every sphere of our lives. Self-esteem indeed has an impact on everything you do; it influences your reactions and perceptions of your personal, professional and family life. People with low self-esteem are more likely to denigrate themselves and feel inferior, while others with higher self-esteem are more likely to see themselves in a positive way and have a more positive attitude.

We all judge ourselves differently depending on our life experiences. Women living with a stoma may experience difficulties, like having a negative self-image, which leads to low self-esteem. Multiple reasons can explain this, for example: Because there are stereotypes about stomata in our society, because living with the disease is a really difficult life experience for anyone, etc.

Despite all these factors affecting the development of self-esteem, ostomate women and women in general must learn to accept themselves as they are. They must accept themselves in all their glory and stop comparing themselves to society’s unrealistic standards. Disease and stoma are experiences that make you grow and make you unique. Today’s women must learn to love their qualities and their faults; their strengths and weaknesses. We should all hush the little voice in our heads constantly criticizing us, and replace it with another voice. One that tells us we are pretty, strong and that we can do it! Obviously, this is a long-winded work requiring constant efforts.

But it’s by accepting, respecting and loving ourselves a bit more every day that we will reach an outcome. We will like ourselves, and feel good and at peace with ourselves. That is what good self-esteem is.

So today, after reading this article, I would like you to look at yourself in a mirror, point at yourself and name one of your strong points or qualities! Start today, and repeat this rewarding experience as many times as you can!

Kloé
Psycho-education graduate student

Français