BEAUTIFUL AWKWARD MOMENTS
Oh, self-disclosure in 2016… an era where social networks are an integral part of our lives. We live in a society where everyone is really active online and where news travel fast, too fast! It’s an era where impersonal interactions are favoured, but they require us to open up and verbalize more. It’s quite a challenge to present, assume and celebrate our differences in a society promoting very specific standards! Obviously, where there are differences, there are awkward moments.
Today I will share the beautiful awkward moments that happened when I told others that I am an ostomate.
As you may have read in one of my previous articles, it was indeed awkward with my boyfriend at first. But this slowly turned into learning about my new body and our new intimacy. I found what to say and what to do to tell him that our relationship now included him, me, and my stoma. This situation made funny, new and touching intimate moments happened. These awkward moments made us grow as a couple.
My family took the news differently. Unlike my partner, who could have chosen to break up with me, the members of my family didn’t have to make a choice. They had to deal with it. They saw me adapting to my new life. I think it was hard for some of them to see a family member suffer while going through an important change in their life. It’s easy to feel powerless. Some didn’t know what to say, and others did everything they could to make me feel comfortable. They all watched the changes discreetly. They didn’t tell me how they reacted to the news. The awkwardness came from their looks and silences. But it quietly disappeared and my family’s presence was comforting, and they were devoted. I will always be grateful for this.
As for my friends, telling them was easier. I felt confident, and I knew there would be no awkwardness between us. They mostly asked questions and were open to the idea that I was going to become a new person.
It was completely different with my co-workers. It was sometimes pretty tricky. When I was younger, I didn’t even dare talk about it. I was afraid of not finding the right words, and I was uncomfortable because I was different. They’re not trying to be mean, they are simply ignorant and concerned. Today, I’m more mature, and I learned that there will be awkward moments because of my differences, but it shouldn’t offend me. People usually ask questions about my stoma, what it means, and most of the time they don’t even dare asking about it, which creates awkward moments.
Keep in mind that if I tell you about my stoma, it’s because I trust you. You can be uncomfortable, you can ask questions, and you can even try to look for my pouch. It’s not easy to see, is it?
Thank you all for welcoming my differences, and know that those little awkward moments will go away. Long live the differences that make us unique, full-fledged human beings!
This article is sponsorised by our partner: Premier Ostomy Centre
