LIVE AS A COUPLE (WITH AN OSTOMY)

Ever since I was a little girl, I've been dreaming about a beautiful love story like the ones you see in fairy tales. A story where I am the princess and where there is a prince charming who would do anything for me. It's cliche, right? Obviously, as we become older, the way we see love changes; this idyllic image of love we have becomes much more realistic. Still, I believe every woman hopes she'll meet someone who will love them and accompany them on their journey through life.

Because I grew up with something like Crohn's disease, it goes without saying that I wanted a boyfriend who'd be there for me and who'd understand what I'm going through. When I was 19 years old, I met my first boyfriend. Despite being young, he was very understandingand he listened to my needs. I was very sick and tired back then, so we couldn't go out much. Eventually, we went our separate ways, and I learned to work on myself. Before undergoing surgery, I remember telling my doctor that the idea of being single at 21 terrified me. Who'd want to date me when I have a pouch on my stomach? In a society where we value body image so much, would I be able to find someone who'd like me despite my difference? I stopped asking myself these questions quickly, because I decided to undergo surgery for myself. The people I was going to meet wouldn't care about it, and they'd like me for who I am. I met a few guys after my surgery, and they all listened to my story and tried to understand how my ostomy works.

And there's also my current boyfriend, who I like to call the man for the job. He can reassure me just by looking at me, and he always finds a solution so I feel comfortable. We dated for a while before starting our relationship. I told him about my ostomy when I felt it was the opportune time. We both needed to adapt to this, because I had never opened up like this to someone before, and he had no idea how an ostomy worked. It took a while before I felt comfortable enough to completely let go when I'm with my boyfriend, and before I accepted myself. I had to accept that I needed to show everything I need to show him everything I am. We went through this step by step, and our love's been growing for a year now. Our relationship is built on respect, care and attentiveness. He's never made me feel Iike wasn't as pretty as the girls who don't have an ostomy. He chose me, and I chose him to be my teammate.

Lately, my friend made me realise how lucky I am to have met someone as caring as my boyfriend. I don't believe every guy would date someone who is different.  Never giving up and believing that the person who's made for you is out there is what makes life beautiful.

Thank you for everything, darling!

Elisabeth

Brought to you by our partner: Centre de Stomie de la Mauricie