Lesson I learned: seven years before my ostomy
Without knowing it, the birth of my first child, Emil, in 2010, had mentally prepared me for you, Rosie, my ostomy. It has been two years since your arrival; saying that it made me happy at the beginning would be a lie. Today, I realise that learning to live with you was a bit like the learning cycle with a new child. Let me explain...
Pregnancy
We finally got the good news: a little baby was about to arrive in our lives! I had nausea and better days than others. I had to buy new clothes to fit my belly and be comfortable. Well, the very first lesson I learned was to adapt. I quickly abandoned my favorite stores to turn to some places where I could cover my huge belly. Fortunately, there are specialized stores, for pregnant women as well as for ostomates. My worries began when my Crohn's disease decided to take all the space during my pregnancy. Medical follow-ups in abundance, stress, anxiety, everything was there. For you, Rosie, I can’t say that it was good news when I was told about your arrival. However, my relatives, as well as the medical team, turned out to be an invaluable, understanding, comforting and encouraging source of support. And with Emil, I had been prepared to trust the specialists, to face the unknown.
Delivery
Just like the birth of a child, you appeared on my belly leaving permanent marks. It’s sometimes said that pregnancy stretch marks represent lifelines. Well you, Rosie, taught me how to live life to the fullest. You opened my eyes to what’s essential. Even before your arrival, the aesthetic aspect of my body didn't deserve the place I was giving to it.
The first year
During your first year, we got to know each other. Diet was a big challenge for my baby. And you, Rosie, didn't come with ostomy equipment guidelines either. I had to try several ostomy pouching systems to find the one which fit me the best, but I was already used to it; Emil had taught me how to be perseverant. My boy filled my heart every day and brightened up my gray days. I learned to seize those sunny rays to bloom even when my Crohn’s was very active. But Rosie, you came along and allowed me to continue grasping this light without tolerating Crohn’s pain every day. You put resilience in my path. With Emil’s arrival, I realised that some friends are just passing through. This taught me to be happy with the right people. In both situations, even if it’s seven years apart, wishing the best for others remains the best thing to do.
The Second Year
For his proper development, my son had to undergo certain ears surgeries. This put me in situations where I had to control my worries. I had to give my trust to qualified strangers to take care of him, he was so small. When you stopped functioning well, Rosie, I was reassured in advance to know that people would take care of me, it was my turn to be vulnerable. With the recent events, the doctor informed me that I would need surgery again. Maybe it’s time to deal with your Terrible Twos, but know, Rosie, that as with Emil, I’m here to grow with you. I prefer thinking it’s essential to your development; it’s wiser than to blame you.
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